Male pleasure: modern techniques and recommended accessories

1. Male pleasure is not just "erection + ejaculation"

Male sexuality has often been reduced to a very simple pattern: arousal → erection → penetration → ejaculation. Anything that deviates from this scenario (failure, premature ejaculation, desire for gentleness, prostate stimulation, the use of accessories…) is experienced as a “bug”.

However, clinical studies and urologists' recommendations say something different:

• Erectile dysfunction, including problems with desire, erections, or ejaculation, are common and multifactorial (stress, cardiovascular health, hormones, psychology, relationship status, etc.).See the American Urological Association guidelines on erectile dysfunction.
• Male pleasure is not limited to the penis: the whole body, the mind, the relationship are involved.
• Accessories can be both fun (more enjoyment) and sometimes therapeutic (better circulation, rehabilitation, reduced performance pressure).

The aim of this guide isn't to turn you into a sex "expert," but to offer concrete suggestions for making your own pleasure richer, more varied, and more compatible with your reality. And if you're already experiencing difficulties (low libido, performance issues, fatigue), you can combine this information with that found in our article on low libido or on intimate rituals for couples .

2. Modern techniques (without accessories) to transform your sensations

Before even talking about sex toys, you can already do so much with your body. These approaches pair very well with slow intimacy and the mindful sexual practices we often discuss on the blog.

Working on rhythm and edging

Edging is the art of approaching orgasm, then slowing down or stopping to allow the tension to subside a little, before building up again. Many men report that this:

• increases the duration of intercourse or masturbation
• amplifies the intensity of orgasm,
• allows them to better identify their "points of no return".

Coordinating breathing and pleasure

Breathing affects arousal, muscle relaxation, and orgasm control. You can try:

• Take a deep breath through your nose for 4 seconds.
• Slow exhalation through the mouth over 6 to 8 seconds.
• Voluntarily relax the buttocks, perineum, and abs with each exhalation.

The more you breathe, the less you're holding your breath, both mentally and physically, and the more your body can enjoy what's happening. You can find more breathing and regulation tips in our article "Stress and Sexuality: 7 Rituals to Reconnect with Your Body."

Change your "masturbation scenario"

If you always masturbate the same way (position, rhythm, pressure), your brain may calibrate itself solely to that. Varying it (rhythm, lubricant, lying/standing position, softer hand) can:

• to make you more flexible (less difficulty in achieving orgasm with a partner),
• to help you discover more subtle sensations,
• reduce the pressure of "having to ejaculate quickly".

You can use a suitable lubricant to change the texture of the sensations, and take inspiration from our advice on masturbation without shame if the subject makes you uncomfortable.

3. Penis accessories: vibrators, masturbators, penis rings

Contrary to popular belief, sex toys are not "just for women." Studies show significant use among heterosexual men and widespread use among gay and bisexual men (over 78% in one American study). Rosenberger et al., Sex toys among gay/bisexual men. To discover these accessories, you can take a look at our selection of sex toys for men and sex toys for couples .

Penis vibrators

A penis vibrator can come in the form of a small vibrator to be applied to the frenulum, the base of the glans, or a vibrating ring. Sexual health resources emphasize that vibration can:

• to increase blood flow to the penis,
• to help some men regain or strengthen their erections,
• Aids in rehabilitation after prostate surgery or erectile dysfunction. Allo Health – Penis Vibrator

You can use it alone or with a partner (on the penis, perineum, testicles, and surrounding areas). Models designed for couples are often found in couples' sex toys , with compact shapes that are easy to insert during penetration.

Masturbators and sheaths

Masturbators (sleeved, sleeved, "sleeve" type sex toys) can:

• to completely change the sensations compared to the hand
• allowing you to work on rhythm, pauses, edging,
• to add internal textures without harming the skin.

Choose models made of high-quality, easy-to-clean, body-safe silicone or TPE , with water-based lubricant. Material guides emphasize the benefits of non-porous medical-grade silicone to minimize the risk of bacterial growth. Allo Health – Body-safe sex toys – Dear Rabbits – Body-Safe Materials. You'll find this type of material in most of the products in our men's sex toy collection.

Penis rings (cock rings)

Penis rings are placed at the base of the penis (sometimes around the penis and testicles). They slow the return of blood to the penis, which can help maintain a firmer and longer-lasting erection. WebMD – Cock rings

Some safety rules:

• Never wear them for more than 20 to 30 minutes at a time.
• Remove immediately if you experience pain, numbness, or any worrying change in color.
• Avoid models that are too tight or difficult to remove, especially if you are a beginner.
• If you have cardiovascular or clotting problems, seek medical advice first.

To start, opt for flexible silicone models that are adjustable and easy to remove, like those you can find in our selection of penis accessories or in some couples' kits .

4. Prostatic pleasure: the male "P-spot"

The prostate is sometimes described as the male equivalent of the G-spot. Some people with a penis describe prostate orgasms as more diffuse, more "internal," and sometimes more emotional. If this topic intrigues you, you can also explore our selection of prostate sex toys designed for this purpose.

Why the prostate is also of interest to health

Recent articles on prostate stimulators mention not only pleasure, but also possible benefits for circulation, decongestion, and, in some cases, urinary comfort (always consult a doctor if you experience any symptoms). Allo Health – Vibrations & Rehabilitation – Example of a Medical Prostate Stimulator

The basics for safe prostate pleasure

• Use plenty of water-based or silicone-compatible lubricant (you can find some in our lubricant collection).
• Choose a sex toy with a flared base to prevent it from "disappearing" into the rectum.
• Start with small sizes, go very slowly.
• Never force it if it hurts: pain is not inevitable.
• Avoid in case of known prostate pathology or unexplained pain without medical advice.

For a first time, small prostate massagers and plugs with a wide base and a thin neck, like those in the prostate collection, are generally more suitable than bulky shapes.

5. Male pleasure in couples: incorporating accessories without discomfort

Sex toys can become a shared playground rather than something used in secret. They perfectly complement the rituals discussed in "10 Intimate Rituals to Rekindle Desire" or "Pleasure Without Penetration" .

Some ideas for two

• Use a vibrating ring during penetration to stimulate the penis and clitoris or perineum of the other person.
• Apply a small vibrator around the frenulum, the base of the penis, and the testicles, while simultaneously performing other caresses.
• Mutual guidance: each person holds the sex toy and shows what they would like to feel.
• Sensual massages with a wand or external massager on the back, buttocks, thighs, before moving towards the genitals.

Talking about accessories without making the other person uncomfortable

You can use phrases like:

• "I want us to have a little fun with this, to see what changes for both of us."
• "I don't want to replace you, I want us to use it together."
• "You try it once, and if you don't like it, you stop."

If the conversation is delicate, you can suggest reading an article together (for example this one, or our guide on couple rituals ) and then choosing an item from the couple sex toy collection or a couple's gift set to "try just one thing".

6. Safety, materials and hygiene: the basics of accessories

A well-made and well-maintained sex toy is pleasurable. A porous sex toy, poorly cleaned or stored haphazardly, is a breeding ground for bacteria or an object that ages poorly.

Preferred materials

Sexual health guides generally recommend non-porous and "body-safe" materials:

• medical-grade silicone
• stainless steel
• tempered glass
• ABS (high-quality rigid plastic)

They are easier to clean, more durable, and less likely to release unwanted substances. Svakom – Body-Safe Materials Guide – The Natural Love Company – Non-toxic Toys

In the shop, most of our sex toys for men , prostate stimulation and sex toys for couples are made of body-safe silicone or non-porous materials, precisely to facilitate hygiene.

Cleaning and storage

• Rinse after use with warm water and mild soap (or special sex toy cleaner) for non-porous toys.
• Allow to air dry completely, then store in a breathable pouch (avoid closed plastic bags).
• Do not leave different materials stuck together (risk of reaction or sticking).
• If using anal, clean the toy very carefully and/or use a condom on it, especially if you then proceed to vaginal/oral use.

Recent guides also emphasize the importance of proper, dust-free storage, rather than "under the bed" or loose in a drawer. Some couples' gift sets even include dedicated pouches, making life easier.

7. When accessories can also support your sexual health

Some healthcare professionals use vibrators, rings, or mechanical stimulants as part of sexual rehabilitation (for example, after prostate surgery or for mild erectile dysfunction). Urological guidelines remind us that erectile dysfunction can be a sign of a cardiovascular or metabolic problem, not just something "all in your head." Medscape – ED guidelines

In this context:

• A vibrator can help maintain good blood circulation in the penis.
• A ring can occasionally support an erection, but with caution.
• A prostate stimulator can be part of a more comprehensive approach to pelvic comfort (always with medical advice if in doubt).

If you recognize yourself in persistent difficulties (erection, ejaculation, pain, significant decrease in libido), the guidelines clearly advise consulting a professional rather than remaining isolated or blaming everything on performance issues. You can supplement this assessment with the suggestions in our articles "Low Libido: Natural Solutions" and "Stress and Sexuality," to also address your overall well-being (sleep, stress, exercise, relationships, etc.).

Conclusion: your enjoyment deserves better than "autopilot" mode

Male pleasure isn't simply a matter of "it works / it doesn't work". You have the right to:

• to love simplicity and curiosity,
• to explore breathing, rhythms, accessories without judging you,
• to ask for support if something is weighing you down.

Modern techniques and accessories don't turn you into a sex robot: they just give you more options so that your body, your mind, and your relationship can find what works for them.

Your pleasure doesn't need to be spectacular, it needs to be yours alone. You can progress step by step: an adjustment in the way you masturbate, a masturbator or penis vibrator , a prostate toy , a couples' sex toy … keeping as your compass respect for your body, your rhythm, and the quality of the connection with your partner.

FAQ: Male pleasure, sex toys and modern techniques

Can using sex toys decrease the sensitivity of my penis?

No, not if you use them sensibly (not on maximum vibration for hours). Skin and nerves can feel a little "overwhelmed" right after intense stimulation, but it's temporary. There's no solid evidence that sex toys permanently damage sensitivity when used correctly. If you feel you're relying on one type of stimulation, you can check out our tips on masturbation and slow intimacy to gently introduce new sensations.

Are sex toys "normal" for a man?

Yes. Studies show that the use of vibrators or other toys is common among heterosexual men, and even more so among gay and bisexual men. [Study on vibrators among heterosexual men – Study on sex toys among gay/bisexual men] What matters is whether it feels good and if you use them safely. To reassure yourself, you can start with a very simple model from the men's sex toy collection or a starter kit for couples .

Can a penis ring replace treatment for erectile dysfunction?

No. A ring can temporarily help maintain an erection by slowing venous return, but it doesn't treat the underlying cause. Urological guidelines advise consulting a doctor if you notice repeated erectile dysfunction, as this could be related to your cardiovascular, hormonal, or psychological health.(AUA Guideline on ED) Rings, which are included in some men's kits , are an additional aid, not a long-term treatment.

Is there any risk involved in prostate stimulation?

If done gently, with lubricant and appropriate toys (flared base, body-safe materials), prostate stimulation is generally safe for a healthy person. However, if you experience pain, bleeding, infection, a history of prostate cancer, or significant urinary symptoms, it's best to consult a doctor before proceeding. To minimize risks, opt for models specifically designed for this purpose, such as those in our prostate sex toy collection, rather than repurposed everyday objects.

How can I talk about sex toys with my partner without making them feel compared?

By emphasizing "we" rather than "you're not enough for me." For example: "I'd like us to explore something together to add some fun/new sensations," "I want us to use it as a game, not a test." Listen to their fears, allow them to say no, and suggest taking it step by step, without pressure. You can also suggest choosing an item together from the couples' sex toy collection or a gift set for two , so it feels more like a shared project than an obligation.

Can sex toys solve all my sexual problems?

No. They can help with variety, confidence, stimulation, and sometimes rehabilitation. But they will never replace:

• A medical check-up if you have repeated breakdowns.
• Therapy if you are experiencing trauma or significant distress.
• Communication within the couple if sexuality is a source of conflict.

See them as tools to enhance your pleasure, not as miracle solutions. And if you feel that the question of pleasure is accompanied by a lot of pressure, stress, or shame, you can read our resources on stress & sexuality and on the links between pleasure and mental health to bring a little gentleness back into it all.

Sources and resources for further exploration

To delve deeper into male pleasure, sexual health, and the use of accessories, here are some resources (mostly in English):

• Prevalence of sexual disorders and erectile dysfunction
  Rajih et al., 2025 – Erectile dysfunction among young men
  Aliakbari et al. – Prevalence of Erectile Dysfunction
  Herkommer et al., 2024 – Sexual dysfunction in adult men
• Guidelines and male sexual health
  Burnett et al., 2018 – Erectile Dysfunction: AUA Guideline
  Medscape – Erectile Dysfunction Guidelines (AUA, UAE)
  Huyghe et al., 2024 – French Guidelines on DE (PDF)
• Use of sex toys among men
  Rosenberger et al., 2012 – Sex toy use by gay and bisexual men
  Herbenick et al. – Vibrator use among heterosexual men
  Allo Health – Vibrator on Penis: Pleasure & Health
• Penis rings, prostate rings and specific accessories
  WebMD – Cock Rings: What They Are & How to Use Them
  New York Post – Doctor-approved prostate device
• Materials, hygiene, storage
  Allo Health – Body-safe Sex Toys
  Dear Rabbits – Body-Safe Materials Guide
  Svakom – Guide to Body-Safe Sex Toy Materials
  Woman&Home – How to Store Sex Toys Safely

These resources allow you to delve deeper, both scientifically and practically, to make your pleasure a less taboo and much more conscious subject. And if you're ready to put it into practice, you can explore our collections of sex toys for men , prostate massagers , couples' sex toys , as well as lubricants that will make all the difference in comfort.